However, Sean – a gay man who claims to be able to drive (a freak, an oddball… surely at least bisexual?) – suggests that my attitude is derived from townie privilege. Although my upbringing was provincial in comparison to London, in the context of central Scotland I was practically a city slicker. The migration of gay people from small towns to big cities, where driving often isn’t necessary, is pretty well documented, which makes this stereotype plausible. Never would I have to do anything so prosaic as ferrying my children to school or driving to my job in an out-of-town business park: I was destined for gayer things. I always knew I was going to live in a city when I was older, so learning to drive seemed like a waste of time. When I was 17, when most of my peers were learning to drive, I was too busy taking mephedrone and playing synth in a band with my female best friend – which is, however you look at it, pretty gay.
